Top 3 Ways to Encourage Your Spouse

We live in an age where divorce is almost expected, and spouses fight with each other instead of for each other. I believe with my whole heart that it is because Christ is no longer the center of relationships. The King of Kings has been reduced to a role of a God we talk to only when something tragic happens, and this is never how He intended it to be. Life is hard, and encouragement is needed through it all. Here are three ways to encourage your spouse.

1) Do the things that they like

Odds are that your spouse wont like every little thing that you enjoy doing, such as sports or shopping. Taking the time to go do what the other likes can go a long way to showing how much you really care and how much you support them. If you take a look at how Jesus did life on earth, you'll notice that He put every single person before himself. In fact, that's why the sacrifice was made on the cross. He loves you that much, so we should love our spouses in the same way.

2) Pray with them

This is huge, and it includes the ladies! I'll be totally transparent and say that in my experiences, most women are scared to pray out loud with their husbands and also in public. My Pastor once told me that one of the most encouraging and uplifting prayers he had ever heard was uttered by his wife during his time of need. It wasn't any elaborate,wordy, holier than thou prayer. It was an earnest plea to God to give her husband strength and peace, and He has remembered that simple prayer for years. So ladies, pray for AND with your husbands. They need it. But this does not exclude us men. We are the spiritual leaders of the household, and it's time we start acting like it.

3) Keep it in the House

What do I mean by this? Too many times in the church and pretty much everywhere else in life do I see people degrading other people in rumors and gossip. It turns into he said she said nonsense, instead of people working it out together. We have a motto at SSBC. "We don't talk about people, we talk TO them." If you have a problem with your husband, tell HIM not your girlfriends. Likewise, husbands don't go complaining about your wife to your buddies. It's always encouraging to your spouse when you work out problems between the two of you, it improves communication and draws you closer to each other.


If I could add a fourth bullet point. I would say that it is absolutely pivotal for a marriage or relationship that you both pursue Christ ahead of pursuing each other. If you want to show your spouse love and encouragement, there is no better source of love and encouragement than what we find in Christ Jesus. I hope you are enjoying the blog's content, and I pray blessings on you and yours. God Bless!!

4 Tips On How to Disciple Your Children

As a Student and Children’s Pastor I always stress to parents that while the church has a vital role in growing children up in the way of the Lord, ultimately we will never have the impact that they can in the lives of their kids. Strong, God loving parents are so important to children, which in turn are super important in our community. We as Christians are called to be productive members of society that stand firm on the promises and command of our Almighty Heavenly father, and it all starts in the home. Here are five tips on discipling your kids to ensure that they grow up with a firm foundation in which they stand on Jesus Christ, the solid rock.

1) Show your children that you are deeply in love with your spouse

The intimacy between a husband and wife is a gift from God, and should be treated as such. Men, open doors for your wives, hold their hands in public, kiss them in front of your friends and your children.Yes, it may gross them out, but it’s okay! Ladies, don’t say bad things about your husband in front of your friends, family or children. These little actions that take place in front of your kids will show them how in love you two are, and will ultimately shape their perception of men and women. One day when the Lord blesses me with children of my own, I want them to be able to say that they want to marry a man like daddy or a woman like mommy. The time that you have with your children and your husband or wife is precious. Show each of them how much you love them

2) Pray regularly in front of your kids

Prayer is an integral part of your life and should be demonstrated to your kids. Actually teach them how to have a conversation with God. I get the idea of the whole ” God is great God is good let us thank Him for our food” blessing of the food, but this isn’t really teaching the children anything but how to memorize something. It isn’t personal to them, and prayer is something that is personal. Pray during the bad times, and pray during the good times. This is extremely important, because our kids don’t need to grow up seeing us praise God when things are going great and then cursing Him when things aren’t. It will ruin their perception of a loving God that cares deeply for us. The dad is the spiritual leader of the household, but He doesn’t have to lead every prayer. Moms, pray with your daughters as well.

3)Show your kids how to be faithful 

This is important in all aspects of life. If you tell your kids you are going to do something, do it. They need to see that consistency from their parents. It’s also important inside the church. Allow your kids to drop the money in the offering plate as it passes by, and teach them why it is that you give back to God in that way. Explain to them why you volunteer for events at church, why you do devotions with them and with your wife. It’s because you love God, and you love his people here on earth. Show them what it means to be a servant and to give back to others.

4)Show them that sharing their faith isn’t so scary

The key with this tip is that we have to learn this for ourselves first (Ouch). If you aren’t sharing Jesus with anyone, don’t expect your kids to do this either. We need to set that example of following God’s commands even if it might be uncomfortable. This will teach your kids to stand on the promises of God even when the odds seem impossible. A good opportunity to teach them is at the grocery store, all parents at some point or another have to drag their kids into Wal-mart or another supermarket. Use this as a teachable moment and allow them to see God work through you.

Children are smarter and more attentive than we realize, and they pay attention to our every move. The Discipleship of your children does not begin at church, it begins at home with YOU, the parents. Take these tips, and use them in your own lives to better equip your children for the work that God has ahead of them. Share this blog and God bless!

Three Things Followers of Christ Should Focus on During the Mountain tops and Valleys of Life

In my short 23 years on this beautiful and chaotic planet, I have learned a few things. Life is full of surprises, ups and downs, successes and failures, highs and lows. These are the mountain tops and the valleys. We all experience them. We see both sides of the spectrum. We can observe the Christlike character that some Christians portray in their day to day lives, which give us hope. But we also see the complete absence of Christ in a person’s heart, which can bring about a number of emotions. As you experience the peaks and valleys in life, here are three things to focus on through it all.

1) God is still God!!

Whatever cards the hand you have been dealt turn out to be, we still serve a God that is the same today as he was when he formed us from the dust and breathed the breath of life into our nostrils. He is a God that loves and cares for us, so deeply in fact that he would sacrifice His own Son to save us from our sins. The amazing thing about this is, he knew each and every little screw up that we would do in our lives before he even made us. The bible tells us that our very best on our own ability is like a filthy rag in his sight. But somehow, in spite of knowing all this, He loved us enough to want a relationship with us. If we focus on the fact that God loves us THAT much, our focus shifts from the mountain peaks and the deep valleys to the heaven that is above it all.

2) Celebrate Your Failures

As a Student and children’s pastor that is only one year into the ministry, I have messed up quite a bit already. One thing I have learned from my pastor’s leadership is to celebrate my failures. Paul tells us in 1 Timothy 1:15-16 “15It is a trustworthy statement, deserving full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, among whom I am foremost of all. 16Yet for this reason I found mercy, so that in me as the foremost, Jesus Christ might demonstrate His perfect patience as an example for those who would believe in Him for eternal life.” Every once in a while I believe that falling flat on our faces will keep us honest and help us to always remember that nothing we do is of our own ability, and everything that we do should be to glorify Jesus. Any success we have in ministry or in life comes from the King of Kings, and we are just vessels that he chooses to work through. So celebrate your failures, learn from them, and remember not to rely on yourself.

3) Turn The Page

All throughout my youth I ate, slept, and breathed baseball, and I was a pitcher. It was all I could think about. So naturally, being as passionate about the game as I was, I put enormous pressure on myself to perform well. When I messed up I got extremely angry at myself and it took my focus off of the objective. My high school coach used to tell me to “Turn the Page”. Basically, that chapter of the book is over, so turn the page and read the next one. I couldn’t change what had already taken place, all I could do was focus on the next pitch, or the next “page”. Realizing that we do have failures and like I mentioned earlier we do need to celebrate on learn from them, but we also cant dwell on them to a point of taking our focus off of the next pitch. We may have done some unimaginably stupid things in our life to hurt ourselves or hurt others, but keep this in mind. God knew every unimaginably stupid thing we would ever do, and still loves us like we’ve never done them. What a God, what a Savior!

This is the very first post of this blog, so I want to mention a few things. I have never before blogged, so this is a very new experience for me. But what I hope to accomplish is to, number one,  encourage you in your daily walk with Christ. Life is too hard not to have encouragement. Share in your struggles with you, number two. It helps to know that others are going through some of the same stuff, we can help each other out! And three, show you that as a pastor, I don’t have it all together. It’s true, we are held to a different standard than the flock, but the shepherd makes mistakes too. I love you all, and I hope this will encourage you this week. 

3 Ways to Connect with Your Students During the Summer

Summer is a time that is notorious in churches all over the world as a time of digression in terms of attendance as well as spiritual growth. The kids are out of school, parents become exhausted, football camps are going full force, and vacations are planned. I fully support vacations because I realize the need to just get away from everything (even the church) and just be with your family and the Lord. These things are refreshing and needed, but it often leads to people just taking the summer off completely it seems. So with everything going on, as a Youth Pastor I need to connect with my kids to make sure they don't get left behind. Here are 3 ways to do that.

1) Have Breakfast with them

I have recently started having a bible study and breakfast with my students every Friday morning at Chick-Fil-a, and I have found that this is a great way to connect with them. Not only does this give you time to fellowship and have fun, it's a fantastic way dive in to the Word of God so they grow spiritually. I would encourage you to invite other youth groups as well. This gives you as the leader a chance to engage the community and also get to know your students on a more personal level.

2) Do a Service with them

The key word here is WITH. Don't watch them work or do the work for them. Find something in the community for the youth group to do such as painting and house or doing yard work for someone who can't. This will teach them how to serve, it will bless someone else and also show your students that you are in this with them.

3) Do Something Fun

Believe it or not, it is okay for Christians to have fun! I don't view God as this big man sitting over us and getting on to us for being too joyous. He wants us to be about His business of course but we can do that while also having fun. There's nothing like a retreat for a few days with your youth group to better connect with your students.

The summer brings it's own unique challenges, but it also brings about great opportunities as well. Don't waste this time that we have to connect with our students and grow closer to the Lord. Until next time, God bless!

3 Things Christians Need to Stop Doing

I am a Christian. I love God's people, all of them. That includes the Jews, the Muslims, Buddhists, Witches, Homosexuals, liars, and thieves, down to the very bottom of the totem pole of society. Believe it or not, so does God!( gasp) Yes, that's right! God loves those dirty rotten people! Of course I'm being dramatic with that last statement, because God does not see us in that way. He loves each of us personally and deeply, so I hope you get the point of what I'm trying to say in this week's blog. Usually my audience consists of parents and teens, as I am a student and children's pastor, although this blog is applicable to all people. This week, I think anyone can relate to it, Christian or not. We are capable of some amazing things when we rely on God to guide us, but every so often we are capable of pushing people so far away from the cross of Christ that they spend the rest of their lives hating the church for it. This is not to condemn you, but to educate you. Here are 3 things that Christians have to stop doing.


1) Stop Condemning People

"Christians" all over the world have done horrifying things in the name of God. The abortion bombings, discrimination against homosexuals, etc. While these things are sins, it is not our place to judge. I think we tend to be outraged by a few certain sins because we view them as bigger than others. What we have to remember is that we have all fallen short of the glory of God, and as Romans 3:10 says" There is no one righteous, no, not one." Yes, it's true that we need to stand firm on God's word and take a stance against sin. But look at how Jesus did it, he did not threaten other's who didn't see it His way. He did not turn His back on them and shun them away from Him. He treated every single sinner, which we all are, with LOVE. The way we act towards other people has to always be in love, or we will never get anywhere.

2)   Stop Being Comfortable

What in the world do I mean by this? I mean plopping our butt in a pew twice a week and thinking that we are okay in God's eyes. I mean reacting in anger every time something doesn't go our way because that's the easy thing to do. I mean not giving back financially to God because we worry about our finances. We tend to stay in our little bubble, protected from everything that we don't want to do because it's uncomfortable. One of the biggest mistakes that we make with new converts is telling them that things will be much easier once you choose Jesus. Yes, Jesus will one day wipe away every tear from our eyes but he also says the world will hate us. Doing the right thing is not always the comfortable thing.

3) Stop Being Scared to Talk to People

If you are introverted like I am, you might have a hard time approaching people about Jesus, or even doing something as simple as welcoming a guest at the church you attend. Don't be so afraid! All it takes is one time stepping out of your comfort zone, and you will find that the majority of people will welcome a spiritual discussion, and they certainly like to be welcomed to a new church that they have never been to before. So many people are turned off from the church simply because no one welcomes them. They feel alienated and looked down upon.

         

         This week's post isn't to discourage you or tell you what you're doing wrong, it is to encourage you and to educate you on some of the things I have picked up on that WE as Christians are falling short of. Notice I said "we". There is always room for improvement in our walk with Christ. Christ is infinite, so there will always be more of Him for us to have. My prayer this week is for us to love as Christ loves us. See you next week on The Pulse, God bless!!